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Post by lokidreaming on Aug 23, 2011 23:40:32 GMT -6
COC,
I just realized what has been eating away at me for several mnths and in turn has to come to an impasse.
I am feeling like
"I am in this world, but not of this world"
The only way I can think of remedying this is to choose a part and play it for a while to stop myself being torn apart every6 which way
Any advice on my current situation?
Belief IS Reality
Loki Dreaming
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Post by I AM the Way on Aug 24, 2011 9:33:16 GMT -6
You've already got the good advice you were looking for. Decide who you want to be, what role you want to play and then be that guy. Live the part. Don't forget to constantly ask yourself, "what's my motivation?"
Awake!
VS
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Post by sin on Aug 24, 2011 10:17:45 GMT -6
Good advice VS, I was asked a similar question by another cultist.
My advice was similar in that I say, if you don't know why you are doing something, or what you want? What the hell are you doing?
I was avoiding catch phrases like "what's my motivation?" Because in my experience, it goes in one ear and out the other, if people are accustomed to hearing good advice delivered in a mundane way.
Sound advice, in either case.
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Post by lokidreaming on Aug 24, 2011 23:33:06 GMT -6
@vs
Whats my motivation?
I know those answers already.
On the other hand I feel like it is make or break time for me.
@cs
Just shoot from the hip straight, so what if people miss what you say, they will eventually figure it out hopefully (one day).
Cheers for the feedback.
LD
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Post by sin on Aug 25, 2011 6:41:58 GMT -6
Sooner, is better than Later...my dear Loki.
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Post by lokidreaming on Aug 27, 2011 1:14:30 GMT -6
@cora'Sahn,
I KNOW!!!...I KNOW!!!
I also relate what I am going through is another bout of painful growing pains.
LD
ps:-that is why I have been taking a back seat at the moment regarding the COC stuff. I rather keep my mouth shut until I have more clarity and focus.
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Post by lokidreaming on Aug 31, 2011 3:44:49 GMT -6
OMG
I habe been reading the holograhic universe and researching quantum physics as a side dish.
WOW!!!
I am bering biased and concuring with the author regarding and his quotes from others how you should take the quantum theory as an aid to help you understand the world/space around you.
(i will post my bbok repoorst as soon as conveineninet aka sober lol )
I am still cnofused as fuck what direction to go when I know what direcrtion to go and I admit I am drunk off my face when I am typing and posting this.
I am going to go on a rant and rave now.
I know it is my fault totally where I am at at this point of my life and how I am feeling about it, however to those who have fucked me off totally in the last month; sonner than later regarding the truth of what you think of a me as a person and now you interpret me as a person would have been more helpful.
I am sick and tired of proving mysself.
Sweiously!!!! I am not a fuckjing mind reader!!! How fucking dare you wait all these months and test me out with your peety games!!! Seriously!!! I am over people waiting months on end on tell me the truth how they think about me via their petty test games.
As i said in my other posts, I know who I am as a person, it is other peoples (expectations) that drives me fucking bonkers.
I have had a guts full!!!
Peace Out
Loki Dreaming
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Post by pseudosherlock on Sept 19, 2011 13:56:26 GMT -6
I've had that same issue lately, trying to figure out where I fit in this world. I was starting to get the feeling that I was too much outside of the world and didn't know how to interact with it.
I basically came to the same conclusion that VS and Cora sort of mentioned. I found an identity or a label I liked (being a writer) and started applying it to myself with pride and going toward it without doubt. It's helped a lot.
What was keeping me from that was a constant fear of labeling myself anything or identifying with anything. Eventually I realized I had to identify with something or else I was just sort of existing and waiting to die.
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Post by sin on Sept 21, 2011 10:27:41 GMT -6
There are some discussions in the archives I'll link you to which directly address identification as a positive action, albeit temporary. I personally do not think that identification is always negative, I think that's a gross interpretation by Ouspensky. Gurdjieff warns us about negative identification, but I believe he found identification as a means to an end, to be positive.
For example, say you wanted to quit smoking. Presently you may identify as a smoker, smoking and with smokers. If you wanted to quit, you just reassign your identification with a non-smoker, non-smoking, and non-smokers. You are willfully, and consciously managing your psychology. Cold-turkey is a reality, no need for buying all that nicotine step-down b.s. - you are self-governing.
In the case of feeling 'lost' because you don't know who or what you are - I can see where a temporary identification of being a writer, writing, and writers could be helpful. Once you get into your groove, don't forget yourself - is the key. In my own grotto, we have a saying YFYF! "You forget yourself fool!" The benefit of having an outside observer is getting that shove that reminds you to remember yourself.
Otherwise, you get lost in the negative identification and you cease to exist. Be as aware as possible, even while you are identifying with being a writer.
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Post by sin on Sept 21, 2011 10:34:55 GMT -6
As i said in my other posts, I know who I am as a person, it is other peoples (expectations) that drives me fucking bonkers. I have had a guts full!!! Peace Out Loki Dreaming This will be a constant issue that people will face, its not going to go away. You have to manage how you react when another imposes their standards on to you. Other people will have their own standards, you choose whether you want to meet them or discard them if you can. Some scenarios are unavoidable. A workplace is a good example of this. An employer will impose codes of conduct, and nurture an expected work ethic. ETHICS. Remember, ethics are social, where morality is internal. So, if a workplace sets a standard, and you have difficulty meeting that standard it may affect your employment with that company going forward. Many companies review salaries and work ethic is part of an employee review. You can certainly meet the standards for the sake of remaining gainfully employed and maintain your internal morality. Compromises in the long-run benefit you. Loki, I imagine you must be working towards something? Any idea of what it may be? It's not always material acquisition, it can be something you seek to manifest in yourself. Maybe you can start with an outline of who or what you seek to become, its a start. |
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Post by sin on Sept 21, 2011 10:39:32 GMT -6
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Post by sin on Sept 21, 2011 10:45:34 GMT -6
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Post by lokidreaming on Sept 22, 2011 2:31:31 GMT -6
@cs
First of all, apologies for the late reply as I forgot about this chain of post.
You are right that some are unavoidable, so I am attempting to remedy this by trying to play a part/character in those situations as a defense and a way to deflect stuff without losing myself in the process and after reading The Powers Of 48 Laws I know this is the right way to do it.
LD
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Post by sin on Sept 22, 2011 6:37:35 GMT -6
Considering that all of this is an internal struggle (Jihad, Mein Kampf), each day is a battle in the war. Sun Tzu's Art of War would also be useful here.
"All warfare is based on deception. Hence, when able to attack, we must seem unable; when using our forces, we must seem inactive; when we are near, we must make the enemy believe we are far away; when far away, we must make him believe we are near. Hold out baits to entice the enemy. Feign disorder, and crush him." -Sun Tzu
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Post by lokidreaming on Sept 24, 2011 1:38:03 GMT -6
The beginning of the clip half sums up what I have been feeling inside the last few months...I know it is part of the growing pains I need to endure.
LD
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Post by pseudosherlock on Sept 26, 2011 0:27:11 GMT -6
@cora - Yes, thank you for the reminder. I've come to believe that identifying with something is okay as long as you are choosing at every moment to identify with it. Once it is choosing things for you, or as you stated, you lose yourself within it, then identification becomes dangerous. But when you put the hat on to say "I am what I say I am" and take it off when you consciously desire, you can go far with it.
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Post by sin on Sept 26, 2011 7:12:39 GMT -6
@cora - Yes, thank you for the reminder. I've come to believe that identifying with something is okay as long as you are choosing at every moment to identify with it. Once it is choosing things for you, or as you stated, you lose yourself within it, then identification becomes dangerous. But when you put the hat on to say "I am what I say I am" and take it off when you consciously desire, you can go far with it. Precisely, which is why self-awareness is so crucial to personal progress. |
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