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Post by tritonusdolphin on Aug 25, 2011 16:33:09 GMT -6
Today has been an eye-opening experience. I realize that everyone else's standards in terms of awakening is different, and also different in definition. I realize that just because someone has a different definition than another, in any given thing does not make them right, or wrong. Because if we are to awake, we began to realize even following definitions or theories like in a dictionary, are also a program in and of itself. That includes any and all books we choose to read, then we believe it, then what? Are we really adhering to our own thoughts,desires, beliefs and what we read we can get influenced especially if it holds an interest to us.
I am looking within, why am I following someone else's definitions and standards, that is what deters me from becoming truly awake!
I mean even within this Cult of Cthulhu Paradigm and other places, it has its own things to believe in, and definitions and terms of certain words, theories or whatever it may be. Some of these things are to benefit us, and other things may be against us.
Are we all really free? What are we doing? its like we are influenced one thing after another, when can we ever be free? I dont care if you are at work , i dont care if you are reading a book about enlightenment, I dont care if you truly are "awake" or at least experiencing it, are you awake from your own personal source or what you feel it may be or are you awake and that term "awake" fits in the description of someone else who had previous wrote about it.
So what am I implying, I am implying the fact that in order for me to awake, I have to live up to my own standards , beliefs, or whatever I chose, and make it work for me, to where I will experience the moment 'I AM', trully I have experienced what this means, when it comes to like doing art work .... "I AM.....(action)" stop, right there, the moment you are in the creative process, you can say "I AM'.... that "I AM" is creating something using your own hands and tools. God is creating something.
"I WILL" (do something), for the moment right there ...
"I CREATE" ... These terms are best described in relation to what it may mean for me personally to be awake. BE awake. That is, not "become" I think of it in terms of present tense, since it is a constant.
It is so easy to get lost in a conversation I dont care if it is suppose to be an intelligent conversation or not, I dont care if we are discussing theories, I dont care if is a intellectual battle, I dont care if it is personal insults or name calling, I dont care what it is we are talking about,you can still go right back asleep and the moment you agree with, someone you have to ask yourself, is this ME or is it by someone else's definitions and standards that I should change to? And IF they have an issue , then that is their problem, and you should move along and ignore it because it is nothing more than a hinderance to your own developement.
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Post by I AM the Way on Aug 25, 2011 19:29:06 GMT -6
An interesting post.
I can see what you mean about not living by another's standards. However, we can't always measure progress by our own yardstick. I know that probably seems counter-intuitive to many people, but that's how it is.
To a certain individual, sitting in a basement watching TV is the ultimate expression of Awakening. But does that have anything to do with the Cult of Cthulhu's understanding of the word? Where does subjectivism end and objectivism begin?
Yes, go your own way but keep the CoC map somewhere on your person. Never know when you might want to reference it.
Awake!
Venger As'Nas Satanis Ipsissimus Cult of Cthulhu
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Post by tritonusdolphin on Aug 25, 2011 19:51:43 GMT -6
Yeah, exactly what I meant, but its hard to know one is truly awake because of all the definitions, theories, experiences or whatever it is. The best way i have come to describe it is as, it is pure chaos, and I could see why the Lovecraft beings or whatever they are, are really a good explanation and also deities of other pantheons as well.
Chaos Paradigm is very useful as well, because "nothing is true and everything is permitted" I take that as anything you feel, see, or sense, is not real aka the illusion, and from the moment of your awareness or being awake, ... everything is permitted. If it hadnt been for this Cult of Cthulhu, I probably would not have become aware of this or understand anything I read that is in relation to like Satanism, Chaos, Left Hand path,etc.
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Post by sin on Aug 26, 2011 7:29:02 GMT -6
I agree VS,
A person can set their standards very low, their own WAY may not be a productive way, or a way to reaching their goals and aspirations. Day dreams, essentially stay just that.
The CoC paradigm as a map, a tool, is accessible, useful, and at times detrimental to disrupt a person's current standards...their way.
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Post by dudetyson on Aug 26, 2011 10:00:07 GMT -6
I think that everyone has a vast challenge buried inside themselves. The CoC is good for providing a challenge, but if it's not the precise challenge that a person is called to, then it doesn't work.
The other flipside is that, yes, a person could just "be true to themselves" by following their weak impulses and not embracing the challenge that their soul issues them.
Lately I've been reading about Jesus, and it's pretty inspiring. Devotion unto death. That's some hardcore stuff.
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Post by sin on Aug 26, 2011 13:51:29 GMT -6
Lately I've been reading about Jesus, and it's pretty inspiring. Devotion unto death. That's some hardcore stuff. I'd be interested in your thoughts on the subject, as I find the holy books of world religions to be wholly occult.
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Post by tritonusdolphin on Aug 26, 2011 14:26:13 GMT -6
An interesting post.
I can see what you mean about not living by another's standards. However, we can't always measure progress by our own yardstick. I know that probably seems counter-intuitive to many people, but that's how it is.
Venger As'Nas Satanis Ipsissimus Cult of Cthulhu
I disagree. Because you are not that person, so how would one know if you truly are awake? Hell I could choose to watch tv or play a video game for my pleasure but that doesnt mean I am not awake, it just means I am doing what I want or choose to do. This is not invitation to be lazy because working on your Self is important and a constant, you can only measure the progress of your development, because you know what is best for you, everything has to be by your choice, not by someone else's, any book or person telling you other wise is nothing more than an affront to the Self from a dual concept, usually with duality you see something separate from you that is the opposite and yet you tip the scales and you fit into that other end of the spectrum. It seems like change relies on the opposites all the time. Being aware of the nature of duality is probably important when it comes to change. I believe in questioning everything and everyone. People have different definitions of what it means to awake, your not in that person's shoes to know it or not if you know what I mean, so how would they know? All enlightenment comes from within, not from someone else, because essentially you have to do the work yourself to do anything. But it always taking someone from the "outside" to disrupt your own programming or mechanical function to make you think for yourself, are you being independent? Are you realizing what it is you truly desire? I believe in challenges, to help you personally grow and think for yourself. Even though this is what you believe, even if I was to stay Awake in the Cult of Cthulhu, it's still someone else's standards and not my own. It is the opposite of me, so I have to tip the scales, and when I do "awake" we see the rest of the world asleep, perception from this state, is dual.
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Post by sin on Aug 26, 2011 14:58:32 GMT -6
You disagree, that if you have no contrast comparison, you can not measure your own perception?
Example: There is only you. You, and your thoughts. No other thoughts but your own.
How can you know, that your own thoughts are not defeating you? What do you compare them to?
You set a standard, for yourself. by yourself. How can you know, if that standard isn't self-defeating?
When we spoke, I used a drug addict as an example.
A drug addict, may be on a downward spiral, if they can not manage their addiction. With no interference, their standards may be set, in such a way, that it may very well destroy them.
I will play the drug addict:
I am fine.
I am fine with my drug use.
I am fine with the fact, that my entire income goes to support it.
I am fine with the fact, that I am losing my home, because of my addiction. I couldn't make mortgage payments, because my drug use, is more important than having shelter.
I am fine with the fact, that I will be physically removed from my home, by law enforcement.
It doesn't matter if I have no place to live. I have my drugs.
I am fine with the hand-to-mouth survival I must endure each day, because I am fine. I set the standards.
I am fine with the fact, that I was fired today. Now, I have no source of income. But I have this bag of drugs.
Shit, now I'm out of drugs, have no money, no place to live, no food. I am fine.
I am fine, because my standards are my own. I set them. I follow them. No outside influence will interfere with my thought process. I am enlightened.
I steal for what I need now. I need my drugs.
Now, I'm in jail. I'm facing life in prison, because I am fine. In my desperation to meet my standards, I have killed someone.
But hey, now I have shelter. Now I have food. Now I have drugs, plenty of drugs in the prison system. Who needs freedom, when I have my drugs.
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Post by tritonusdolphin on Aug 26, 2011 16:19:59 GMT -6
The question is how do you know that your thoughts of another person is defeating your perception of them being awake? Everything is perception, your perception of me is what you see me as? Do you see me as being asleep, just the "opposite" of awake? (dual) I am merely stating the emphasis, how do you know if one is awake or not? You are only looking at my appearance, my actions, you are not looking within, you are not seeing ME, the real me, "I AM" buried under all of the things I do. You will only know if it is me, when I do truly function from a place of enlightenment, you will SEE, that I willfully and mindfully choose these things or allow something that benefits me, influence me. But someone who is always influenced by something else, is not what they appear to be, including books you read or whatever, your thoughts may not be your own, but someone else's thoughts because everytime we have a thought, its usually of someone else's idea, theory, or whatever, but yet we mistake them for our own.
Do you feel that I am only functioning because of an influence of something else? I am AWARE of what I am doing, but yet someone else tells me that I am not, is that your perception of me?
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Post by dudetyson on Aug 26, 2011 21:05:32 GMT -6
I'm having difficulty telling if playing Fallout 3: New Vegas is worth my time or not, on this note. To many people it appears utterly unproductive, but I feel the game is so dead-on about what's going on in society that I feel like I'm learning by playing it. Or maybe I'm just playing a video game for no good reason...
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Post by sin on Aug 27, 2011 6:15:09 GMT -6
It depends on the context, or the situation. In the case of my example. I would hardly find this person claiming to be aware, awake, to be so. Unless their clear aim, was to spend their life in prison, sacrificing their freedom for the means.
In terms of outside perspective, if a person is expressing themselves in such a way, that they can not see themselves, but the viewer can (at the very least) see their actions - perhaps the viewer can say to themselves: well, hey - this person is obviously lying to themselves, and in an utter state of fake-awake. Should they, in the context of fellowship, say nothing? Or, should they then, point out that they are a fool and recommend tools?
The point VS, was making about keeping the map on your person - its a tool, you can choose to use it, simply as a Way. If you are experiencing a droning, or lull in your progress - its there.
If its a matter of saying: Screw you, you don't know me. I am awake. Well hey, go on with your bad self. It's your life, afterall.
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Post by sin on Aug 27, 2011 6:16:57 GMT -6
I'm having difficulty telling if playing Fallout 3: New Vegas is worth my time or not, on this note. To many people it appears utterly unproductive, but I feel the game is so dead-on about what's going on in society that I feel like I'm learning by playing it. Or maybe I'm just playing a video game for no good reason... My son plays this game. Could you pull out a context as it relates to this note? What have you learned?
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Post by tritonusdolphin on Aug 27, 2011 7:10:59 GMT -6
I am pointing this out because so many people refuse to know who I AM they only see the surface of me, over and over again I have tried and tried to express myself to them but who am I kidding, i am only doing so, to fit what they consider an awakening or an enlightenment is. But some people refuse ME, because it doesnt fit their perception that you would hardly see someone awake.
But yes, it is the truth that some people would have such a way of awakening, but normally someone like us would consider them dumbasses, do we know THEM? Why are they really doing is?
What I am merely saying is a person would know and is aware they are not their desires, thoughts, emotions, and they remember themselves. But willfully choosing what they Will, to a person who doesnt understand this, they appear as a dumbass to another person, while another person sees him as awake, another sees a person as a lost soul or another person may have a different perceptive all together, does this deter them from what they truly are? No it doesnt. These people have perceptive of this one person.
But that person is not anybody else's perception but his own. If he decides to see himself as an the "god of this world" or the "messiah" then clearly that is what he is. But underneath the perception, he could be asleep or awake. Just like me I could see some people in the Cult of Cthulhu as asleep, is it my ego that wants this so I force myself? is it clearly my observations? is it the way I respond to things? or WHAT is it if I dont know? I dont judge another person, I dont know them personally, I am not in their shoes, so I can't measure their awakening or enlightenment, even though I am doing that right now but only to make a point.
Another example is relationships, romantic relationships, when we are with someone, are we there because we LOVE them? Or is it because they pleasure us, lonely, their hot, sexy etc. There are many reasons why someone wants to be in a relationship, often times they are not in there for the reasons they think, then one day, something from the outside or an experience makes them wake up and reinforcing them to think, question all things, including their perceptions, to where all of this is coming from.
I only SEE matter moving through time or at least that is what it is, something inside of us, well I like to call it the Black Flame and the Green Flame that is basically within the Dark Force and it urges me to Will WHAT I AM, basically meaning to BE and do what is innate for what I DO.
See that animating Will, that darkness within a person -- this is the most beautiful thing, I could see. But even this is my perception on the feeling or observation i get from watching you or viewing you.
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Post by sin on Aug 27, 2011 7:46:28 GMT -6
I understand.
This is why I feel, that to know me, is to know my expressions. That is 'how' we can understand or relate to one another. I learn to understand the expressions of others. I suppose its a contributing factor as to why I harbor no ill feelings towards anyone really, even if they have wronged me in some way, I get over that real quick. I don't harbor. I learn the expressions of others, perhaps understand why the 'wrong' was made, as well as, realize that each person is not what they were yesterday. They are not their stories. I am not my story.
In terms of levels of awareness, you can recognize this in yourself and others as well. We all have peaks and bows in our awareness, and mechanical living. We all have our vices, habits, and mechanisms. Some Work, some drone along and we are affected by each other. That mind-to-mind exchange is ever present.
Using the example you gave, relationships, I think we can all look at relationships (of any caliber) we have had and know when we have fallen subject the habits of others (and vice versa). Even the drive to have a relationship with another person, may be under scrutiny.
The fascination with people-watching, is both an exercise in learning expressions and learning about ourselves.
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Post by boksmutant on Sept 7, 2011 2:11:32 GMT -6
This is so epically rad! Well put.
Awake!
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Post by sin on Sept 7, 2011 14:16:50 GMT -6
I'm glad it was understood
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