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Post by amble on Nov 9, 2008 8:51:41 GMT -6
You may or may not agree with any or all of this, but i'd like to know any thoughts or opinions.
I first encountered awakening listening to talk by a buddhist monk who said that every day when you brush your teeth, you autoimatically just start brushing from the same place every time, because that's how you've got used to doing it. Instead try and make sure you start brushing in a different place each time. Now, simplifying the concept down to brushing your teeth brings it more into the realm of the mundane, but i think it's still a useful idea.
Whilst I was doing this one day i noticed that when i look in the mirror, and try to get into the state of mind of being awake, it's much more difficult than just sitting on your own. As though, due to the reflection, the intensity has doubled. Has anyone else experienced this?
Also, i find it much more difficult to get into that state if my eyes are closed. Whenever i have done the exercise previously i have had my eyes open, and so experienced visual...weirdness shall we say. But with my eyes closed, my brain is constantly trying to decide what the shapes on the insides of my eyelids resemble, so that it can identify them. Which again, ramps the difficulty up.
I don't mean to be sounding like a whiny pussy. I know it's not easy to walk this path. I was just wondering if anyone else had experienced these things, and what works in the way of combatting them.
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Post by I AM the Way on Nov 9, 2008 15:02:37 GMT -6
yes, small deliberate changes can be useful. driving a new way to work, eating a sandwich from both ends, or when people ask you how you are, say "radiant".
as long as these tricks don't become routine obsessive/compulsive behavior, i think it's a great way to kick-start some Self-Remembering.
not sure about the reflection thing... if there is more stimulus, then greater degrees of distraction are inevitable. however, new experiences in themselves are fuel for Awakening. rare occurrences such as your birthday, a bloody car wreck, or re-reading a beloved HPL story can put you in a state of being slightly more Awake.
it's also important to note that there's no off/on switch. we are not either asleep or Awake, there are many subtle levels between either state. that's why little shocks can lead to greater shocks and partial wakefulness might eventually become extreme wakefulness.
Venger As'Nas Satanis Cult of Cthulhu High Priest
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Post by sol on Jan 2, 2009 22:01:23 GMT -6
id say that there is an 'off' switch to being awake because most days i have to keep it down or i have too much to pay attention to. So much that it is hard to keep pace with someone who is not self aware.
And reading certain things also keys me into certain realms. I read Aliester Crowley if i want to make some good poetry and feel real mystic and listen to Lateralus if i want to feel angelic and slipknot if i want to feel demonic
But then it comes to interaction. One on one communication with individuals online or here in person has been very incredible. I would say online a heat comes upon my entire body rising from my spine at times and my temples pulse.
It is euphoric
In person my core being radiates with people that I get to know, at first I glow bright. As I learn more and get closer I become much darker in personality but far more intensly bright as a material object
the passing of the torch to those i become close to is like an infection.
Do you ever feel like the people around you that look up to you at one point slip away into the world and suddenly you see everyone around them looking at them in awe and wonder?
The greatest teacher creates more teachers.
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Post by amble on Mar 15, 2009 18:11:14 GMT -6
I experienced some particularly weird moments today. I was at work talking to a customer and had been making a conscious effort throughout the day to try being more awake while talking to everyone i encountered, since that is one of the things i have most difficulty with. And as i made a conscious note to myself that i was awake and paying attention to paying attention, and listening to the conversation and being in the moment i suppose, it came time to count out the change to give back to the the customer. I discovered that i had forgotten how to count. I had trapped myself into concentrating on being awake so much that i was more asleep than before. I was not even monitoring how things were going. I was happy to discover this however, because noticing that it had happened meant that i was awake enough to know i had been asleep.
The second thing that happened occurred on my walk home. I took a minute to myself to feel the air, listen to the wind and the trees. To try and really feel the darkness around me. As i concentrated on being in that moment in time, it occurred to me how much we assume things are their title or use. A car drove by and i recognised it as a car, but in a disassociated way. I understood that it was a normal thing to see, and that i wasn't in danger from it. But i have never looked at a car like that before. Simply as a thing, without any inherent meaning, without attaching a word to it immediately. Then the same happened for trees, houses, the road and the kerb. But then i got caught up in the excitement of the realisation and lost the moment. But it was interesting to be in that mindset, even for a short time.
I just thought i'd share this. See if there are any more comment or thoughts?
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Post by I AM the Way on Mar 15, 2009 21:49:34 GMT -6
yes, very good. imagine how disorienting it would be if you were asleep your entire life and suddenly Awoke... you would undoubtedly forget how to count, how to interact with people and things, time and space would seem quite different to you.
keep practicing. in time, your familiarity with this new state will decrease the jarring effects and increase your conscious awareness.
quite so. it is strange to see the world while detached from life, from ourselves. everyone should attempt this exercise daily. sometimes we Awaken just our emotional center, other times just our intellectual center. i believe it's even possible to be conscious through our physical center. imagine all three opening at once!?!
VS
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Post by Xor'Nefthrahm on Mar 16, 2009 10:27:42 GMT -6
I notice that sometimes when I am awake, I will get a rush up my spine, and then suddenly be REALLY awake.. as in aware of all my surroundings in my mind at once. A very strange sensation, a bit overwhelming to the mind.. I imagine with practice, just like with any exercising, the mind will be able to picture more and more, with less of the strain type feeling.
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Post by amble on Mar 16, 2009 11:21:38 GMT -6
I notice that sometimes when I am awake, I will get a rush up my spine, and then suddenly be REALLY awake.. as in aware of all my surroundings in my mind at once. A very strange sensation, a bit overwhelming to the mind.. Yeah, i have felt that. Quite fleetingly so far, but it's defnitely there. That feeling of being overwhelmed is what always snaps me out of it again. Does anyone get the feeling that concentrating on being awake more leads to quite heavy mental exhaustion later on? There have been quite a few days the last couple of months where, during the morning and afternoon i find it relatively easy to keep myself awake for a minute or two at the most, but during the evening i find it difficult to manage even half a minute. I find my thought processes have slowed down, my brain is operating much slower than usual. It rights itself after sleep, but i just found it odd. Is it just fatigue like anything else?
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Post by I AM the Way on Mar 16, 2009 15:14:26 GMT -6
my guess is that you're a morning person, rather than a night person. am i right? i'm a night person. personally, i find it easier to get away from ordinary life and the mindset it brings in the evening.
the more energy you use, the more energy you will receive. there is a barrier of effort that must be broken, but once this barrier has been exceeded you will be able to draw as much energy as you need. each of us have untapped reservoirs which we cannot get to in our everyday life. we need a shock at least every day... Lord Cthulhu, give us our daily bread. this shock is self-remembering.
think of your muscles when working out for the first week or two. it's exhausting. you feel like you can barely get through a little baby workout. but you keep at it, and by the third week you feel energized and refreshed from exerting your muscles. after about 8 weeks, those who are conscientious about their work will start to see astonishing results. it is the same with your esoteric exercises; consistent effort will eventually pay off many times over.
VS
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Post by amble on Mar 16, 2009 20:19:41 GMT -6
Actually, i tend to be a morning person. A very early morning person. Night time/early morning feels less static-y than daytime. There's a lot more psychic interference, or so it feels.
I figured that doing the exercises would work much the same way as muscle exercise. That it gets easier with practice.
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Post by Shaz'rahjeem on Mar 24, 2009 18:37:05 GMT -6
It doesn't really get easier in the sense that a muscle work out does. It does however let you start to realise a few ways inwhich you can achieve a higher gnosis more fluidly. On the other hand using the same method over and over will run it dry, and then you will end up asleep merely assuming that your in a waking state. I found that looking at my reflection is a great way to awaken. I always find it interesting howmany variations of the one experience there is. Again though, if you start to feel like its getting easier, maybe you should be trying harder or longer. The only thing that really seems to come about, is understanding the notion of being awake, and becomeing more aclimatized to what it feels like. It will still feel alien and off balancing, but you will recognise it and be able to use it. One thing you may find you have trouble with is that by the time you start realising the wakeful state at that moment you already fall asleep, so to speak. Or atleast you drop from a higher gnostic place into a more relaxing level. Being able to hold the gnosis over a period of time is one of the harder things to do. EDIT: heres a thread i made a while ago. cocthulhu.proboards105.com/index.cgi?board=fourth&action=display&thread=1892Hopefully i have helped
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Post by whatsupable on Jun 7, 2009 8:41:45 GMT -6
what i experianced is everytime i thought i was awaken after i am not sure i was and it is hard to remember how it feeled.
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